I love You, because we are different

We are different
That's why we're meant for each other

There are too many crowd out there complaining for the difference among us
Most people said 

It's OK to be different

but in fact, they keep complaining those bumpy road along the way. 
so it comes to the random thought of me

What is the meaning of difference for them?

Or maybe, the sentence hadn't finished yet, maybe they meant to say 

It's OK to be different (as long as i can handle it)

So once they think it's too hard for them to handle, they wont take it as a difference anymore..
It's a HARM of their lives. 


i don't wanna be such a hypocrite, sometimes i also put those sentences on the bracket as well, but it doesn't mean that if there are few differences that i couldn't handle become something that would threaten my life or something. 

the most i would do is just Questioning 

why on earth would this thing happen? 

Right o, it's not my first post about differences and such things alike. 
it might not something new, but i love to talk about this matter because i live surrounded by the difference and somehow i'm happy and most importantly I SURVIVE

Thursday, April 15th 2010. I read my new novel to start the Day then when clock struck 10.40 am, friends of mine invade my room then for about 15 minutes later, they already throw such a little crowd in my (not so big) room. Then we made our way to XXI to watch MY NAME IS KHAN

we are so left behind (I KNOW!!!)... But it's better late than nothing, now i'm hanging on this aphorism. Anyway, it's such a Must SEE movie. 

You guys would easily found the details about this movie, therefore i wont tell you the synopsis. 

in its own way, it tells you lots of thing about differences. That it isn't something that you need to fight for, because you're already born with it. It's God's deed. Then if you believe in God or Whatever it is who rule this massive world, would you still complaining and fight for eliminating those differences? 

then i'd ask you one interesting question 

if we are now the same, would we still arguing each other?

No wonder, i'd say HELL YEAH. What do you think?


I heard uncertain voices say "NO", but definitely more voices say "YES"


So, if it's a YES, why would we fight for those differences? why would we hate others who don't behave, think, and dress like us? 


Why oh Why my Dear friends??


one of the scene in this movie pictured how the non moslems treat the moslems or the people's who they suspect as moslems. Not nice at all !!!

They could've done something better than that! For God sake, they are SMART and for me, it's not an action to protect their selves but really, it's such a humiliation for their own selves. 

MISCONCEPTION and Surely 1 sided point of view is the main cause.     

i am in a state very confident to shout this phrase out loud. 
why so? 

Because i -once- lived in among those non-moslems. 
i felt how hard it is to be a minority figure among those majority

i knew how much effort you need to make your smooth entrance among those people who have pretty different cultural background, skin color and not to mention the expressed emotion. 

i had the intrapersonal fight about should i do my religion responsibilities while those people didn't even pick any religion as i do or shouldn't i? 

i experienced  how hard it was to explain something that i wasn't even know exactly what it was about. Jackpot!!!


i felt the confusion about how should i behave as an Indonesian among those Australian, while there's a 'hurricane' between Indonesia-Australia diplomacy. 

I know those things perfectly and to be honest, it was kinda bumpy road for me. For a while, i lost my track and i'm proud to declare that.

i wasn't fail. i fell but then i was back on my own feet. Also, i got the special Bonus.. I am now not the same old Nhira, i am the Brand New Nhira.

Khan acted as genuine as he is. he said everything which cross his mind. he said YES when he thought that's the only word he should say and also his heart shone because of his humanity. 

was it enough to make others accept him as the way he is? that he's a moslem? 
No... It was not. 


i acted as genuine as i could be. i smiled to pretty much everyone i passed by. i respected older people and i heart those little kids. i tried to explore everything. i didn't argue much and i tried to live my life to the fullest. 

When abu bakar Ba'asyir was released from jail and from any other accusations, my heart pumped hard. he was accused for the Bali Bombing and few australians are the victims. it's really natural if they strafe me with questions about the released and it's not impossible if then they perceive me as their enemy. I couldn't even dare to imagine how mean they would be to me. NOT EVEN ONCE...

i tried to cheer myself though 

you've done such a tremendous thing Nhira. You never did any harm to them. why worry?

Well,, Were those good deeds enough? for most of moslems or Indonesian in America, those things were NEVER enough. And i thought, these australians will do pretty much the same thing.  God, screw Me!!


Then i realize that God loves me so much for not putting me on that kinda situation. my friends' and neighbor's reaction toward this matter was really unbelievable. 

Instead of alienating me or  offending me, they were really supportive (if not) wise. 
they once asked 

what do You think about Ba'asyir Nhira?

i had no answer but 

personally, i don't heart him. even tough they said he's clean. i think he's not that clean.. although i'm an Indonesian, i don't support the adjudication.

everything i said were really something that cross my mind. i didn't try to please anybody but myself. 

And when finally one of them said 

Listen Nhira,,, If you think we would across you just because this Ba'asyir thingy or anything about indonesia-australia diplomacy, we have to say we're sorry to disappoint you. We are NOT going to do that to You. most importantly, how can we do that to you?

i stood in real silence

couldn't even say a word or even breath..

You are such a nice girl. You smile almost everytime. You never do any harm to us and we believe you won't (he smiled). This business is about we and you. even tough there's a war between our country, it means NOTHING. Because all that matter is about YOU whom we see eveyday, hang out with us everyday, and smile to us everyday. Damn others!!

WOW!!! it was a breath taking moment

i could do nothing but said 

Thanks, That's very sweet of You all

I wasn't even dare to think this moment would happen, not even a sec

but it happened..

those people who live in Manypeaks, about 40kms in the south of Albany tought me how you should see someone through his heart

those people who always work really hard in the farm have a lot better understanding about differences and how to cope with that. 

 3 of us are different in skin colors, culturally background and mother tongue.

i am from Indonesia, jasmin is originally from germany and Kate is the australian.

can't we be best friends? 

 see the difference here? 

are we all alike? 

No..

Then should we hate each other because we are different?

Family isn't a term for groups of people who share the same blood,

but also emotionally bound. 

This is My Family..

 They are the Best parents in the whole world..

Proudly to say, they are from 2 different countries and cultures

and they share the same language called LOVE

It's not wrong, It's not right. It's just different

and there's nothing wrong about living in the differences

You know what? the simplest word i know is "I", the sweetest word i know is "LOVE" and the only thing that remind me of that is 'YOU'

i LOVE You my Dear friends and family, because we are DIFFERENT

Happy Birthday Mum

Dear Mum,

It's 24th of December,

Today is your birthday..

happy birthday Mum,,

You know how bad i am to be on the plane right now and finally hug you and say

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY LOVELY MUM

I know you will have such a wicked birthday ever.
You've been through such a hard year, but now you can scream to the world aout loud that you're finally back on your own track and you're happy with your life.

I adore you for every things you've done...

I love the way you love people..

You love people unconditionally, and that makes you very special.


It's so sad if i admit i only celebrate your birthday with you ONCE

i really want to celebrate it again with you,

but distance wont keep me to say this happy birthday greetings...

I LOVE YOU MUM,,,

My Home

Home

it is a simple word, but for someone who already felt how warm a home could be, i will not ever take this word for granted.

what is home anyway?

this thought is suddenly came across my mind when i cooked tea for me tonite (just few hours ago)

is this what you call home?

or, might be this??

no? perhaps this is what you want??

all right then, if you still haven't made your mind, i will show you my home.

This is my home. My home is not such a big one, you might see it as a small one, but once you step your feet inside, you will see how special this home is for me.

here's the picture of my home:

 

suppose you might see it as just an ordinary home..

look clearly mates.

have a better look with all your eyes open.

i mean your 2 bright eyes and your heart's eyes.

open those eyes wide, then you will see these..

my beloved family

 

family comes first

great friends

my cousins

 

i and icha

 

my friends

my friends

BSC 25ers

DPKers

old friends never die

smansa-ers

afsers

ASHS girls

afsers

 

Jikustik

aussie girls

afsers

 

Dora the Explorer

i and kids

afsers

 

great books

afsers

afsers

my home is full with those people

as a matter of fact,,

in my opinion

HOME isn't a term to describe a nice looking stiff building 

but HOME is a term to describe my feeling when i'm surrounded with the people and things i love

then my heart says "this is it, i want it last forever".

Mates, this is what i am talking about

to be at your own home, you dont need to stay at a nice building and do everything you want to do.

You just need to find someone, something, even bunch of people and even more things that you like to make your day.

i experience it quiet a lot.

I usually feel that i'm home when i eat my favorite food, such as rice (fresh from the rice cooker) and scrambled egg + soy sauce, nasi kuning, soto banjar, ikan rabuk,very spicy hot noodles and also when i drink es setrup

i feel pretty much like home when i am on the phone with my family

i feel like i'm home when i'm having quality chat and also pretty good laugh (even until you think that there's no way you could stand up or even sit while you are laughing, all you wanna do is just rolling your body on the floor) with my campus' friends,smansa alumnies,  BSC 25ers,  and also AFSers

i feel like i'm pretty much at home when i see tons of pictures, that could suck me up into those moments that we shared together then laugh and cry at the same time

Friends of mine characterize me  as Jikustikan (fans of Jikustik), and it's true though. Jikustik is totally all over me, they are like my biggest obsession and my own personal drugs. every time i hear their songs at some random places, i would just stand/sit still and begin to listen to it quietly. watch their performance on tv and live makes my heart pounding harder and faster. only see their action, it suddenly make me feel i'm already home.

i feel like i'm home when i talked to mum via YM, FB or email and then share few things about our daily -sometimes boring- routine

i feel pretty much like home, when i could laugh so hard while watching pretty good cartoon or tv series and suck in to their world.

wicked books are also my favorite things to make me feel home

Keep thinking about my dreams, to finally step my feet on england's land, become a professional clinical psychologist, to finally have a great carreer and also great family to share my life, and my others dreams also keep me alive. visualizing those things make me feel i'd reach my dreams then settle in my own home

i even feel like i'm home when i just lie down on my bed and all of the sudden my memories put me on the ride of memories roller coaster. it scares the hell out of me, but it makes me smile. quiet bright enough to make my day.

This is my home my friend

a home that always stay there, welcoming me every time i want to go home

a home, a first place that always pop up in my mind every time i'm sad, happy, get scared, worried, and when i find a place to catch my own breath.

No matter where ever and whenever i am, whoever i am with, as long as i am happy and my heart fits in..

i would say "I'm already HOME"

sometimes pictures tell us more

sometimes, pictures tell us more than words could do...

 

the cover

  

letter for my family

  

 a song for them

 

Melbourne i'm in love

  

these kids are gorgeous

 

  

exchange students diaries

 

  

TA,,,

 

i'm such a lucky exchange student...

My story isn't the most  magnificent one,,,

My story isn't the best one,,,

but hey, it's my story
n i'm so grateful for everything i have...

because,,,seriously...
i don't need something better than this...

I LOVE it the way it is,,,

Golden year

i got this poem about 4 years ago, when i was still an exchange student in my hosting country (Australia)...

reading it now, makes me sucked back into my GOLDEN YEAR (as i could say..)

it was once a lifetime experience for sure,,
and i will keep those memories in my mind,,
not to be cried about, but only to be memorized...

for all exchange student in this world,,
i present you this...


THE GOLDEN YEAR 
by an exchange student

"A year has past and now we stand on the brink of a returning to a world where we are surrounded by the paradox of everything and yet nothing being the same.

In one month we will reluctantly give our hugs and, fighting the tears, say goodbye to people who were once just names on a sheet of paper to return to the people we hugged and fought tears to say goodbye to, before we ever left.

We will leave our best friends to return to our best friends.

We will go back to the places we came from and go back to the same things we did last summer and every summer before.

We will come into town on that same familiar road, and although it has been months, it will seem like only yesterday.

As you walk into your old bedroom, every emotion will pass through you as you reflect on the way your life has changed and the person you have become.

You suddenly realize that things that were the most important to you

a year ago, don´t seem to matter so much anymore, and the things you hold highest now, no one at home will completely understand.

Who will you call first?

What will you do your first weekend at home with your friends?

Where are you gonna work?

Who will be at the party on Saturday night?

What has everyone been up to in the past few months?

How long will be before you acctually start missing people barging in without calling or knocking?

Then you start to realize how much things have changed, and you realize the hardest part of being an exchange student is to balance the two completely different worlds you now live in, trying desperately to hold on to everything while trying to figure out what you have left behind.

We now know the meaning of true friendship.

We know who we have kept in touch with over the past year and who
we hold dearest to our hearts.

We've left our worlds to deal with the real world.

We've had our hearts broken, we've fallen in love, we've helped our best friends overcome eating disorders, depression, stress, and death.

We've lit candles at the grotto and we've stayed up all night on the phone just to talk to a friend in need.

There have been times when we've felt so helpless being hours away from home when you know your family or  friends needed you the most, and there have been times when we know we have made a difference.

Two months from now we will leave.

Two months from now we will take down our pictures and pack up our clothes.

No more going next door to do nothing for hours on end.

We will leave our friends whose random emails and phone calls brought us to laughter and tears this summer, and hopefully years to come.

We will take our memories and dreams and put them away for now,saving them for our return to this world.

Two months from now we will unpack our bags and have dinner with our families

We will drive over to our best friend's house to do nothing for hours on end.

We will return to the same friends whose random emails and phone calls have brought us to laughter and tears over the year.

We will unpack old dreams and memories that have been put away for the past year.

In two months we will dig deep inside to find the strength and conviction to adjust to change and still keep each other close.

And somehow, in some way find our place between these two worlds.

In two months....are you ready?"

it's been way long ago since i was staying in Albany, Australia. 

Still, i can remember each details of it. 

Those memories will always be in my heart forever