For the all of the things i’ve been through

Dear Blog….

Time goes so fast

Everything comes and goes fast

Everyone’s home and away

I’m not desperate, i really am not. i just think about all of the things i’ve been through. Just sit on the swing or on the gazebo, listen to Shannon Noll CD, look at the garden and bite my lips, and all of my memory is ready to go. and one by one, they are pop in my head, and suddenly i see a huge white screen, and ges wot???? i’m the star. i can see myself…… On that screen….. doing heaps of thing….

i start watching that movie…. and i just screaming loudly….

Hey…look at that excited look….i was so excited when i was finally step my feet on aussie land

Hey…look at that shaking body….i was soooo cold, it was in the middle of winter when i came to aussie

Hey….look at that proud look….i was so proud when i introduced myself to my friends n my teacher. "Hey….i’m nhira, exchange student from Indonesia.Nice to meet u"

Hey…look at that silly look. i felt so stupid, when i couldn’t understand what my friends was talking about. and when i didn’t get what they meant.

Hey…look at that bright smile when i answered the question "So..how long have u been here for?" "I’m gonna be here for 10 months"

Hey…look at that…i was laughing with all of my friends on the school auditorium.teasing each other, or i’m being the only victim of them.

Hey…look at that… i was laughing with my host mum n my host dad on the lounge room, laughing about something on the telly, or we were taking on piss of one of us.

Hey…look at that…. i was laughing with my host bros n host sis while we were having barbie.

Hey….look at that…. i was laughing with my host nieces n nephews while we were playing on the garden, or we spitted the water to each other.

Hey…look at that….i was smiling when i got goldy from my teacher.

Hey…look at that… i was smiling when i met my friends when we were on the way to our own classes.

Hey…look at that… i was so excited and happy when i got a call from my family

Hey…look at that grumpy look…. i was feeling really hot or maybe i was upset with "somebody" or when i couldn’t control this feeling.

Hey…look at that plain look…i was looking something that i didn’t really look at it or maybe i built a castle in the sky. Just pick one…..

Hey…look at that…. i was looking really worry about my test or maybe about the things i’ve done which wasn’t quite right.

Hey…look at that shiny eyes….i was so excited when the time for my fave programme was about to on or maybe i saw something that i liked

Hey…look at that blushy face… i was so blushing when my friends or my host fam talked something really nice about me.

Hey…look at that nasty look…. i was nearly crying when i felt hell sore feeling on my toe.

Hey….look at that grins look…. i was smiling transparently when i remember something funny that was happening. especially when i thought what my sister’s gonna say when she’s seeing me walking. "Jalan macet ya a’ ??"

Hey…look at that unmeanable look…i was so blank when i saw it look at me with its eyes. felt uncomfy…

Hey…… look at that miserable look…i was so confusing when i was thinking about my life after this, or exactly my life after the end of june 2006. when i walk towards the Garuda Airlines, fly to my home country and come to my own house.

Hey……look at that lazy look…when i heard someone asked me about "When do u leave us Nhira?" and the look when i answered "End of June". i tried to smile, but it’s just for hiding my feeling. and i felt much worse when they said "Ooohh…that’s soo soon, we r gonna miss u. i’m gonna cry when u leave us". Do u reckon i’m not gonna do the same thing???? i’m going to…maybe worse than u Mate !!!!!!

Hey….look at that serious look…. when i was studying or listening to the teacher or cooking something on my food production class

Hey…look at that tired look…. i was so tired after studied all day or cleaned the house or maybe did gardening, but i’m still happy though

Hey…look at that bright smile….when i heard mum said "Thanks for the tea darl…That was beautiful… u r my fairy"

Hey….look at that cloudy eyes….when i missed home sooo much. thought about my dad, mum, my sissy, all of my family. thought about everything that i’ve missed since i’ve been here…

hey….look at that guilty look….i felt so guilty for my family about the way i’m feeling now.

Hey…look at that look…i didn’t even know what my sight meant. i just felt really miserable, when i saw the pictures of my indonesian’s friends year book. i felt like…am i on the right place at the moment??? i belong to there…. but i’m not there !!!!!!!!!!

Hey….The movie finishes …. Huh….i’m feeling so relief…. i feel much happier now… The one thing i know is..i do the right thing. Don’t need to feel guilty, cos i’m doing the right thing. Thanks for making me realize that thing Dorothy….

Hhhhh….that was pretty much what i felt. more than that i suppose, but i really can’t be bothered to mention it one by one. That’s enough to tell about i’m Happy with the way i am in here….and hope still happy forever n ever.

i always love this phrase " Think positive, Smile to everyone then all of the happiness in the worlds is yours". Hope it is…and i hope u too Mate…

i really do wanna close this page with this sentence

"And Finally she lives happily ever after"

Have a grat life Mate !!!!